How to tell if your dog loves you this Valentine’s Day

We love our dogs, but do they love us back? We may provide them with lots of tickly belly rubs, gentle ear scratches and loving kisses, and tell them that they are a very good boy/girl and that we love them to the moon and back, but how much do they understand – and how do we tell if they love us, too?

Does my dog love me?

“There’s no scientific way to truly tell,” says animal welfare charity Blue Cross. “We know dogs bond with their owners. Studies show that in the presence of people they know, dogs release oxytocin, a hormone linked to positive emotional states such as love and friendship. We also know dogs miss their owners when they’re away. On that basis, it’s possible to say dogs can be strongly attached to their owners.”

Can love be put into words?

But the notion of love – an intangible concept that we recognise when we feel a close connection that makes us feel trusted, respected and supported – is incredibly difficult to explain, even by human psychology experts and scientists.

“Many animal scientists in the modern era remain reticent about the use of the term ‘love’ in non-human animals because the concept is too subjective,” notes Jules Howard in BBC Science Focus. “After all, if generations of poets cannot agree on a definition of love, then what hope might science have? This is why many dog researchers prefer the word ‘attachment’ when referring to the bond that dogs have with us.”

Amie M Gordon PhD, writing in Psychology Today, admits: “As it turns out, a few dozen experts on the topic of love are still struggling to define it. What is love? Is it a feeling? A behaviour? Some scholars wonder – can we even put love into words?”

But we do, and as it turns out, there’s a good chance our dogs understand exactly what we’re saying.

Your dog probably does understand when you tell them you love them

“Most dogs understand around 80-100 words, but some highly trained dogs can learn hundreds – or even more than 1,000 – words,” says US vet Jennifer Coates. “Every dog is an individual. Some seem to hang on our every word, while others only respond to a few of their favourite phrases.”

She points to a recent study that revealed a list of words and phrases that dogs who took part knew. These included everyday items such as ‘collar’ and ‘ball’, cues such as ‘fetch’ and ‘go get your...’ and phrases including ‘thank you’, ‘what a sweetie’ and, impressively, ‘I love you’.”

Dogs are better at reading us than we are them

Since evolving from a shared ancestor with wolves, domestic dogs have been our loyal, tail-wagging companions, helping us to find food, keeping us warm, and protecting us from danger. In fact, living in close contact with humans for over 30,000 years has enabled dogs to develop skills that allow them to interact and communicate very efficiently with people – more so than any other animal.

Recent studies have shown that the canine brain picks up on emotional cues contained in a person's voice, body odour and posture, and read their faces. These findings support the theory that dogs are capable of understanding emotions behind an expression on a human face, using different parts of their brains to process them.

“Dogs arguably get more from our tone and body language than our actual words,” state canine behaviour experts at VCA Animal Hospitals. “They observe our physical clues to determine what we want them to do or not do. They watch our facial expressions, posture, and body movements. They listen to the tone of our voice. They combine all these observations to determine our meaning.”

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While it seems that dogs have got us humans sussed, we may not always be quite as in tune with some of their expressions of love.

How to tell if your dog loves you – read on to discover what dogs do that reveals their true feelings...

So, how do our dogs tell us that they love us? Let us count the ways!

1. Giving us the warmest of welcomes

“If your dog rushes to say hello to you when you walk through the front door, this is a good sign they’re happy to see you, and they’ve missed you,” says Petplan. “They’ve probably been waiting for you, and they associate you with fun and companionship. Even if your dog tends to greet everyone, there may be things they do differently when they see you. Look out for heightened examples of dog body language. They may want to jump up, bark, whine, and they may even leave a toy or game they’ve been playing just to greet you.”

2. Displaying wonderful, whirly tail wags

“You’ll know your dog is really happy to see you when they treat you to a full body wiggle, which starts at their shoulders and carries on through to the tip of their tail,” says Blue Cross. “You may even see the ‘helicopter’ tail, where the tail spins around in a circular fashion like a rotor blade on a helicopter. This type of tail wagging is usually reserved for people that are special to them. It's most often displayed when dogs see their owners.”

3. Loving licks

“Licking is a behaviour dogs use to comfort, soothe, clean and bond with other dogs. So, when your dog licks you, it's their way of being connected with you and showing their love,” says Petplan.

4. Rubbing faces

“There's nothing quite like the feeling of your dog nuzzling their face against yours. This adorable act of doggy love doesn’t just feel like it could melt your worries – it does,” says PetMD. “Physical contact between pups and humans, like those gentle nudges, lowers cortisol levels (stress hormones) in humans and dogs.”

5. Looking into our eyes

“When dogs and their human companions look into each other’s eyes, oxytocin levels in both species rise dramatically,” notes Jules Howard in BBC Science Focus. “In one study, just half an hour of loving glances between humans and their dog companions was all it took to see levels of oxytocin more than double.”

6. Raising an eyebrow

“Dogs make more facial expressions when their human is paying attention, suggesting these expressions are deliberate attempts at communication. The eyebrow raise can also be an expression of love,” notes PetMD. “When dogs raise their inner eyebrows, their eyes appear larger and even more puppy-like. Can't help but say ‘aww’? Scientists believe this expression is a deliberate attempt to trigger a nurturing response in humans, persuading us to shower them with more attention.”

7. Talking to us

“While some breeds are more vocal than others, many dogs will 'talk' to their owners with barks or whines to get attention or express emotions,” says vet Natasha Watson. “If your dog barks or makes sounds when they see you or during moments of excitement, it could be a sign of love and attachment.”

8. Sharing their special stuff

“You know your dog loves you if they bring you their favourite dog toy,” says PetMD. “This behaviour is an invitation to play and a sign of affection. It shows they trust you with their prized possessions, and they enjoy spending time with you.”

9. Being right by our side

“Dogs are pack animals by nature, and they want to be with their pack mates. If your dog loves you, they’ll see you as their packmate, and they’ll want to be near you all the time,” notes Petplan. “The dog pack looks after each other when they rest and sleep, so it’s your dog’s instinct to sit with you or sleep as close to you as possible. This shows they feel safe with you and want to protect you.”

10. Being our faithful shadow

“‘Follow you around like a puppy dog’ isn't just a saying; it's a sign that your dog loves you. Dogs are pack animals, and you're a favourite pack member,” says PetMD.

11. Finding comfort in the way we smell

“Dogs find comfort in their owners’ scent and may even go as far as stealing their laundry. One study discovered that dogs may experience positive emotions when they sniff their owner’s scent,” notes dogster. “The findings in this experiment may help explain why many dogs find comfort when they’re left with an article of clothing that belongs to their owners.”

12. Mirroring our emotions

“Dogs are remarkably empathetic creatures. If your dog mirrors your emotions, it's a sign they love you,” says vet Natasha Watson. “They may sense when you're upset or happy and adjust their behaviour accordingly. For instance, if you're feeling down, your dog might come and sit by you or offer comfort.”

Show your dog how much you love them

As well as telling our dogs we love them, there are lots of ways we can show our emotional commitment to them.

Burgess in-house vet Dr Suzanne Moyes MVB, MRCVS says: “One of the best ways to show your dog the love they deserve is to learn more about them. Start by knowing the five animal welfare needs, gen up on your dog’s nutrition requirements, and get to grips with body language and vocalisations. While dogs may be one of the easiest pets to read, there are still postures and expressions that we humans sometimes get wrong. Learning about all the ways your dog communicates with you will open up a whole new world. After all, if you love your dog, it's a fantastic feeling when you can recognise that they’re showing they love you back.”

The power of love – our dogs live in our hearts, and our dogs are devoted to us

“We don’t need scientific studies to know that our dogs understand us,” conclude canine behaviour experts at VCA Animal Hospitals. “The canine ability to comprehend human body language and intonation is amazing.”

“Humans and dogs adore each other,” adds author Jeffrey Kluger, in an excerpt entitled Why Dogs and Humans Love Each Other More Than Anyone Else, included in TIME How Dogs Think: Inside the Canine Mind. “What began as a mutual-services contract between two very different species became something much more like love. None of that makes a lick of sense, but it doesn’t have to. Love rarely touches the reasoning parts of the brain. It touches the dreamy parts, the devoted parts – it touches the parts we sometimes call the heart. For many thousands of years, it’s there that our dogs have lived.”

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